Chewy Coconut Cookie Crisps – That Time of the Month

Chewy Coconut Cookie Crisp
You know it’s that time of the month when you eat two cookies before 9 am by justifying them as the same thing as muffins, only smaller and harder, then, because you feel guilty about eating two cookies before 9 am, you skip lunch.

You eat two more cookies anyway because you’re hungry because you skipped lunch, then allow yourself half a cookie as an afternoon snack because you’re on the “half-diet” on which you only eat half of whatever is in front of you, but you eat the other half anyway because really, who eats half a cookie?!

Then, because your body can now no longer function at any level below sugar shock (!!!), you end the day by shoveling the entire second layer of cookies under the foil in the Tupperware that you brought to the office in the first place expressly because you had to get the cookies out of your house lest you eat them all because if they are there, in your house, just sitting there, in your house, you will eat them, but you. Don’t. Want. To eat. Them.

So genius you, you took them to the office!

Gee, that strategy totally worked out well.

And guess what time of the month it is.

It is time to pay the bills.

It is time to pay rent, pay renter’s insurance, pay auto insurance, pay health insurance, pay insurance insurance. It is time to pay credit card balances, pay water bills, electric bills, gas bills, cable bills (ok, I don’t have cable TV because the Food Network done hurt mine feelings, but apparently, this Internet thing isn’t as free as we thought, now is it?!?!), cell phone bills, medical bills (wait, didn’t I just pay health insurance?), and bills for products and services that I am sure I never ordered but my name appears in the glassine window so I have to pay them.
Shredded Coconut for Cookies
Paying bills gives me stress. It’s not the act of paying bills itself, because really, I feel a strange sense of accomplishment when I have a neat little stack of envelopes in ascending order of size that are perfectly address-labeled and perfectly stamped alongside a corresponding rainbow stack of actual bills that have been stamped in red stamppad ink “Paid” with a date and check number. It’s that paying bills is a painful reminder that I don’t have a job.

Coconut Cookie Dough
Not having a job gives me stress, and when I stress, I eat Every. Thing. In sight. (**See footnote) Unfortunately, my stress management behavior also includes Mental Bakedown, and more unfortunately, I can’t use the Get-Baked-Goods-Out-of-the-House Strategy that is doomed to fail anyway because I don’t have an office to which to excommunicate the sinful cookies because I don’t have a job. So not only am I stressed because I am once again reminded that I don’t have a job, but now I’m fat because I’ve eaten seventeen cookies in two hours and having fat gives me more stress than not having a job.

It’s quite the convoluted vicious cycle.

And if you think Chewy Coconut Cookie Crisps are bad, wait until that once-in-a-long-time total eclipse of that time of the month with that hormonal time of the month.

The cookie dough never even makes it to the oven.
Chewy Coconut Cookie Crisps

Chewy Coconut Cookie Crisps

Baking is supposed to be an exercise in stress-relief, so preheat your iPod to the most relaxing music you have. I usually go with Eminem.

Chewy Coconut Crisps Ingredients:

1 cup all-purpose flour
½ teaspoon baking soda
½ teaspoon baking powder
pinch of salt
½ cup (1 stick) softened butter
½ cup granulated sugar
½ cup brown sugar
1 large egg
1 teaspoon vanilla
1½ cup flaked (or shredded, whatever) coconut

Chewy Coconut Cookie Crisps Directions:

Preheat oven to 350.

In a large bowl, sift together 1 c. all-purpose flour, ½ tsp. baking soda, ½ tsp. baking powder, and a pinch of salt.

In a separate bowl, cream together ½ c. softened butter (that’s 1 stick of butter for the measurementally challenged) and ½ c. each of granulated and brown sugars. Beat in 1 large egg and 1 tsp. vanilla.

Mix flour mixture into butter/sugar mixture, then mix in 1½ c. flaked coconut.

Drop by teaspoonfuls onto an ungreased cookie sheet (there’s enough butter in the dough) and bake for 8-10 minutes until cookies are light brown and edges are toasted.

Cool on racks, wrap them up, and give those b**ches away.

** I don’t actually mind being jobless, but given that I am technically full-time jobless in a market in which jobs are hard to come by for the majority of the jobless population, I feel sort of assholish to not feel the same pain.

Blog Widget by LinkWithin
  • H. C.

    Ha! I’m going through that time of month too — actually a bit behind, I keep telling myself I’d finish taking care of the bills on the 1st. But hey, it’s April — who am I foolin’?

  • sarah j. gim

    hc: i am MORE than behind because i have been wasting time on that OTHER thing that gives me even more stress.

    TAXES.

  • cookinpanda

    oh stress… well, these cookies will certainly help.

  • Grace

    i’ve stopped kidding myself–now i just bake a pie, take a carton of ice cream out of the freezer, sit in front of the tv, and eat my anxieties away.

    hey, ya do what ya gotta do.

  • sarah j. gim

    mary ellen: i saw your comment earlier and included the recipe! ;)

    cookinpanda: these cookies, yes. plus whatever comes out of my ice cream maker, plus the boxes of girl scout cookies already in my pantry, plus…at this rate, i sould be beyond zen by morning

    grace: a whole pie. that impresses me :)

  • sarah j. gim

    mary ellen: i saw your comment earlier and included the recipe! ;)

    cookinpanda: these cookies, yes. plus whatever comes out of my ice cream maker, plus the boxes of girl scout cookies already in my pantry, plus…at this rate, i sould be beyond zen by morning

    grace: a whole pie. that impresses me :)

  • Anonymous

    I like that “Mental Bakedown.” I may have to start using that term.

  • StickyGooeyCreamyChewy

    Bill paying gives me anxiety too. Even when I have the money, I hate parting with it. Just having it sit there in my account makes me feel secure! Writing checks makes me ravenous! Just thinking about writing checks makes me ravenous! Um…gotta go bake some cookies now.

  • sarah j. gim

    anonymous: it just so perfectly describes what it is, don’t you think?

    sgcc: especially these days, keeping cash on hand is probably the best thing to do with your money.

    except, of course, investing it in baking ingredients. butter, sugar, flour eggs – commodity investing is the best way to go, imho.

  • Miss Tiffie

    it’s not even that time of the month for me and all i can think about is cookies now… all i smell are cookies… >_< ;

    note to self: it’s all in the head..

    sigh. time to head down to the office cafe and buy some cookies :) look what you did!!

  • oddlyme

    Those look divine!

    Question – is it sweetened flaked coconut, or unsweetened?

  • sarah j. gim

    miss tiffie: it’s all part of my master plan…

    oddlyme: i think i used sweetened, but now that i think about it, unsweetened would have been better because the dough itself is very sweet.

  • Hillary

    Oohhh, that time of the month??? Hmmm…I thought you meant a different kind which these cookies would be equally good for. They look delicious. I love your intro…I totally bring food into the office and wind up eating it myself all the time!

  • Emily

    You are hilarious.

  • Anonymous

    In a selfish way, I’m glad you don’t have a job b/c when you did, you NEVER blogged and I love this blog.

  • sarah j. gim

    hillary: yeah – but like i said, when that time of the month coincides with THAT tome of the month, wow. it’s scary.

    emily: thank you :)

    anonymous: wow, i honestly think that’s the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me about not having a job!

  • Raw Food Diva

    I am past the “that time of the month” thing but yet I still have the cookie in the morning situation going on sometimes!
    thanks for your nice blog!

  • http://bakememore.com Laurel

    Hello! I know this is an old post, but I am interested in the recipe. For me though it shows up all jumbled together… Just trying to make sense of it! I am enjoying your site by the way!

  • jmz

    Your recipe and its comments made me laugh! I wish you the best and hopefully you are gainfully employed and still making these gems.

    All the best!

  • http://www.familyfreshcooking.com/blog/ marla (Family Fresh Cooking)

    Oh the vicious cycle of stress, food rewards, food stress. Yeah, I would be shocked if everyone hasn’t gone through this at some point. At least if you are gonna have a cookie party, these are the ones to turn to. If they had some chocolate chips in them……..even more trouble. Not like these coconut yum yums need anything more :)

  • http://www.thedeliciouslife.com Sarah J. Gim

    jmz: still “funemployed,” sort of. The past two years have been wholly dedicated to TasteSpotting! And by “wholly” I mean “holy sh**, I can’t believe that this is my work.” :D

    Marla: chocolate chips would have been an awesome addition to these, or maybe even dipping half the plain coconut cookie in melted chocolate? O the endless possibilities…

  • http://vanillakitchen.blogspot.com dawn

    I’m sooooooooo (<–is that annoying?) that you are back to blogging….I love your crazy-honest posts.

  • http://www.thedeliciouslife.com Sarah J. Gim

    dawn: omg it is. sooooo annoying ;) and thanks. I’m still trying to get back into the habit of blogging — the mechanics of taking pictures, editing them, uploading, etc isn’t that difficult – just like riding a bicycle, you know? But it’s just hard to get the writing confidence back. I really find myself stuck sometimes in the writing part, but I have to keep reminding myself…this is a blog. Not a master’s thesis.

  • http://ingeniousinkling.typepad.com/ SmilynStef

    I thought the cookies were good on day one … then I tried them on day two … oh my goodness, even better.

  • Betty

    I made these cookies tonite and they’re almost all gone! It’s a keeper recipe, but I think I’ll double it next time. I can’t remember how I found you ( I think someone on one of my card stamping blogs directed me) – anyway you’re bookmarked in my cooking file. Thanks!!

  • http://www.thedeliciouslife.com sarah

    Smilyn Stef: I may have to make these again soon…I don’t think I’ve ever tried them the second day (they don’t last that long)

    Betty: Thanks for bookmarking The Delicious Life!

  • Jules

    I tried this recipe and my cookies came out totally FLAT! They taste great but look kinda sad–I’m going to a cookie party and presentation counts :)

    Yours look so fluffy/puffy…any idea what I did wrong?

  • http://www.thedeliciouslife.com Sarah J. Gim

    Jules: Hm. Cookies can come out flat for a couple of reasons:
    1. butter too soft (room temp, juts soft enough to cream) or
    2. over-creaming/beating the butter and sugar.

    Other than that, I can’t think of anything else that could make them flat unless your baking soda or baking powder are expired?

    If you try baking the cookies again, let me know if they come out better…

  • ChowJoe

    Jules, in addition to what Sarah mentioned, have you checked your oven temperature lately?

    Is it possible it’s at a much lower temp then you’re setting it for?

  • CindyK

    Making these cookies today- LOVE,LOVE,LOVE that the most relaxing music on your ipod is Eminem. Think I will listen to him while I bake today, in your honor!!

  • http://www.thedeliciouslife.com Sarah J. Gim

    ChowJoe: thanks for adding the note about oven temperature. reminds me…I should calibrate mine!

    CindyK: at this time of year, with how frenzied everything is, eminem is, in fact, the most relaxing thing!

  • Jules

    I tried making them again keeping all of your suggestions in mind, but they still turned out flat.

    No one minded the shape of the cookies–in fact they were fondly referred to as “Sticky Wrinklies” They were incredibly tasty and a hit at my cookie party. They are now a must-bake for any family gathering.
    Thanks for the recipe and the advice!

  • http://www.thedeliciouslife.com Sarah J. Gim

    Jules: Glad the cookies worked out any way :) We’ll do that, too. Tell everyone that they’re supposed to look like those lacy flat Florentines :)

  • Brenda

    Easy and yummy recipe! I Googled “cookie crisp” and found your site! Thank you so much! (I’m eating my third cookie)

  • Briget

    First of all I googled umpteen coconut cookie recipes and kept coming back to yours, mostly because of your presentation….my life.for some unknown reason I needed a coconut fix. I ate a lot of batter, then I added some finely chopped pecans, ate some more batter and cooked the rest. I turned the broiler on the last 30 seconds to brown. Heavenly. I didn’t have all purpose flour and used self rising…a little flat, but be assured, I’m not giving those bi&?!. away. Thank you for your recipe.

  • Marisa

    I have made this recipe several times. I have been using it as my base cookie recipe. Sometimes I use coconut, sometimes chocolate chips, or both. I haven’t had any problems with it. I love it! Thanks!

Previous post:

Next post: